Kodak Moment

May 14, 2013 in los hijos, San Francisco with 17 Comments

The photographer said “let’s take some shots on the sidewalk” to what I thought “Really?  The sidewalk is not that nice.”

She seemed confident about the location and he was ready to go,  so I grabbed my own camera and followed them with the hopes to learn some pointers from the pro and take some photos of my own.

There we were, on the dirty sidewalk just across from an abandoned gas station with cigarette stubs on the floor.  She started shooting so I did as well and the first picture I took was this one:

The sidewalk turned out to be a great place.

They both continued working as I struggled to keep up.  Suddenly, he looked at my lens and it dawned on me… these are his last photos as a 10 year old.

We celebrated his birthday last week with a sleepover.  We invited 5 of his friends to stay at the Intercontinental Hotel downtown San Francisco.  It was epic.  And it was also the last sleepover he might have.

 

The kids where well behaved but having a suite filled with 11 year olds is very different than when they used to come over the house with their sleeping bags.

He has become a young man, and that realization made this a Kodak moment.

Moraleja: A photograph can reveal more than you think.

p.s. I showed Mateo this blog post and as soon as he saw the title he asked me ¨What does Kodak mean?”

 

Wonder Woman is NOT Perfect

May 10, 2013 in Días Festivos, Introspección with 10 Comments

Hay madres profesionales, hay madres que se quedan en casa y hay madres que lo hacen todo. Todas nos sentimos como Wonder Woman.

Dicho eso hoy llegué a una realización, ser una madre imperfecta es algo tal vez mucho más valioso para nuestros hijos. Quemar la comida de vez en cuando, decirles que no puedes jugar con ellos en ese momento porque tienes que trabajar, dejarlos vernos llorar por estar abrumadas y muchas cosas más (de vez en cuando) es necesario para en realidad mostrarles nuestro true self.

Es necesario que nuestros hijos vean que no somos heroínas, es necesario que nuestros hijos vean que no somos perfectas, pero que aún así tratamos de dar lo mejor de nosotras mismas para ellos.

Yo me volví madre 4 días antes de cumplir 21. Mi hijo cumple 11 años este mes. Me recuerdo que los primero 3 años lo más importante para mi era mantenerlo vivo ya que no sabía muy bien lo que estaba haciendo. Hemos crecido juntos, hemos aprendido uno del otro y nos hemos amado tal y como somos.

Mi hijo sabe quién es su mamá, más allá de mi nombre, él me conoce. Sabe acerca de mi felicidad y de mis sufrimientos. Sabe que él siempre será mi bebé pero que al mismo tiempo lo estoy criando para ser un buen hombre. Sabe que si le digo algo que no le gusta es por su bien y ante todo sabe que soy su mamá no por que lo tuve sino porque yo tomé la decisión de serlo.

Moraleja: Que tus hijos conozcan tus imperfecciones es un regalo lindo para ti y para ellos.

Feliz Día de las Madres

It’s a fact: I’m an old soul

April 26, 2013 in Introspección with 12 Comments

I’m one of those people who consider themselves an “old soul” but never once did I think that I would have the wisdom of a 109 year old.

Just one day after writing my last post “Everything Looks Beautiful” , I was challenged by life, not only physically but also emotionally.

I cried.

Today the tears have dried but my whole body still aches.

My son’s alarm went off a little before 7AM, waking everyone up but him.  Still in bed, I grabbed my phone to check the time. My Facebook account opened and I saw this 1 min video…

It’s short, but says so much. I heard myself in that video and realized that I am on the right track. This made me feel better.

I wouldn’t dare compare my suffering to a holocaust survivor. But what she said, I had once said HERE  before and I couldn’t help but to feel wiser, happier and thankful.

It’s surprising how people with such different lives could have the exact same thought. Hearing her say words I had said even if it was coincidental, made me feel validated as an “old soul”.

Not sure I will get to live to 109, but today I sure woke up feeling that age… And it feels good.

Moraleja:  “I see beauty everywhere” – Alice Herz-Sommer

Everything Looks So Beautiful

April 24, 2013 in Cosas Hermosas, San Francisco, travel with 3 Comments

No matter where I look I see beauty.  The sun is out and every pore in my body can feel it. Drops of sweat run down my body.

The past few days have been a warm mix of spring and summer.  It took me a couple of weeks to get South Beach out of my head but finally I feel home again.  I brought some heat with me all the way from FL but didn’t think twice about leaving the humidity.

Sand has transformed into grass and art deco houses into victorians.  I no longer lose myself in the horizon of a blue sea, because what I see now is known to me.

I currently live in an apartment.  It’s a wonderful space. It’s enough for our two children, our three dogs and the two of us. But more often than not I dream about a house.

I fantasize about how our next home looks.  Just like the MASH game my son plays with his friends, sometimes I end up with a mansion and sometimes with a shack.

Today, my future house looks like this one:

There is something so magnificent about red doors.  Depending on the direction your house faces, a red front door can be great Feng Shui.  In China, red traditionally symbolizes happiness. Elizabeth Arden was on to something with this one.

Everything looks so beautiful.  No matter where I look I see beauty…

I hope my humble post puts a little more beauty into the world.  I pray for those who suffer, for those who are victims of attacks and for those who are responsible for them.

I hope more eyes than mine can see that beauty is all around us, but most importantly I pray that more hearts than mine can feel that beauty is also within us.

 

Moraleja: Looks can be deceiving but true beauty always shines through.  

 

 

 

I Have An Urge To Bake: Missing some sweetness

April 20, 2013 in Amistad with 4 Comments

I have an urge to bake. Anything from banana bread and lemon pound cake, to chocolate chip cookie truffles and Crème brûlée.

I am craving sweet. Through baking I am trying to create sweet memories like the ones I just had with my friends. I am trying to find comfort in food to miss them less.

I wish Farah was here, I wish her bun-in-the-oven would make her want endless desserts. I would bake her anything and everything to make her little baby happy.

I wish Adriana was here, so she could help me concoct the perfect cocktail to pair with my delights.

I wish Ezzy was here, so I could make a special dessert just for her son, friendly to his food restrictions.

I wish Lina was here, so I could figure out if she likes desserts at all since I have never actually asked her.

I wish Letty was here, to make her a dessert so true to her Latina roots that would warm her rebel heart and inspire her to immediately produce a piece of art.

I have an urge to bake. And build a house full of sweets like the one once stumbled by Hansel and Gretel but without a witch.

The six of us would live there at least for a few days; like we did not so long ago in a hotel suite. We would continue to share stories and make more magic moments.

We would be ok with gluttony since a bigger sin would be not to love each other like sisters. We would not think about the extra pounds we might put on since we would probably burn them all laughing.

We would not worry about the calories since our relationship even though crazy is fundamentally lean and clean. All we want is to love each other and accept one another just the way we are.

I have an urge to bake… to create sweetness, to feel loved from the inside out and to live the sweet life.

Moraleja: Loving can be bittersweet. But I’ll focus on the sweet. 

 

 

 

 

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